Lauren "Lo"

I just found out you've passed away. Heaven got an angel. I can't find the tears to cry or the words to say, it's shocking and so unexpected. I don't know if it's because this has become so normal - to go on facebook and find another one gone. Or maybe its that we had made so many plans for when I got back to Minnesota, plans that I haven't accepted will not happen. Plans to go to the beach or to uptown. Plans to order shirley temples or join a bible study together with Elle.

I sit here silently in Cape Cod, wondering where the words will come from - where the words will go. My heart aches for those around you, those who will miss you. My heart aches for the best friends who will not have you to call and for those whose worlds just lost a little light - this world lost a little light. Your smile could brighten any room, your laughter was infectious, your sense of style enviable and your love for the Lord thirst quenching. 

Through reading your posts I found myself drawn more to God each day and my heart yearns for a closer relationship with Him, a relationship that you yourself had. Watching you was inspiring and I am so proud to say that we were friends. I only wish that we could have built on that friendship as we had planned. 

I can only imagine that the reason I am not crying is because I know that you are with God and that you knew you would someday see him. That you would someday go home. Maybe God will not let those tears flow because as you have said so many times, he has a plan - and his plan was to take you home. Your life has saved so many before this day and will save so many here after. See you in heaven Lo, see you at home.