Sunday, July 22, 2012

Friday, July 20th - Driving toward tragedy.

Friday morning I woke up early to get ready to depart to Colorado. While packing I loaded my computer and signed in to Yahoo. Of course the first this I saw is the news of the movie theater shootings that took place just hours ago, while I  slept. I instantly began crying. The emotion that ripples through ones soul after reading of such a senseless tragedy is breath taking. To imagine being in the moment, in that space, while something so horrendous falls around you in slow motion is heart wrenching and unimaginable. I cannot imagine the pain of those who lost someone on that day in Colorado. I cannot imagine the grieving process of not only those with lost loved ones but of those there to witness the movie-turned-war-zone. My heart and prayers go out to them a hundred times over and I can only hope that solice is coming as the days pass by. 


I continued to think of Aurora, Colorado as I loaded my car and found my way to a cracker barrel for breakfast and as I drove the 11 hour trip to Denver. I passed gorgeous landscapes, and boring ones [buck up Kansas]. I heard beautiful songs and listened to testimonies of those at the movie theater and who had lost loves ones flooding through my speakers. At one point as I entered a new highway my GPS registered how many miles till my next turn - my next turn wasn't until Aurora. Each time I looked at the screen I winced. And even so I wondered how something so far removed could effect me so. 


In all reality I don't know if its the deaths or the realization of the unexpected. Although I find the deaths to be unmistakably and unshakably tragic I also find the simplicity of it all the scariest. I think what ripped through me more than anything was the thought of enjoying something so simple - a movie with family or friends - only to have the moment and your life ripped from you so easily in a matter of minutes. Death is sad, but death is normal - eventually we will all die and the way it happens may not be as we pictured, but when you are robbed of that life in the middle of a moment - it is exponentially more sad, more grave. So, although I has no connections and no loss - I ache when I think of the smiling faces, waiting for a new scene in the movie, only to awaken to a new life. 


The sadness continued as I arrived in Denver and met my sister. While a happy moment commenced with cooking and preparing for the bachelorette party, we could help bringing up the topic over and over  throughout the day and evening. I am so blessed to have my family still in my life - and to know that everything will be okay. I can only pray that those effected by what happened in that Aurora movie theater will also know that it will be alright, someday. 

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